The Teams and their Fan :

Aldershot Town: 'Sh*ts.
Altrincham: er, Alty actually.
Bath City: Barf (Sh*tty).
Boston United: The Grims.
Chester City: The Bloos.
Dagenham & Redbridge: The Dirge.
Doncaster Rovers: Don't Arse with US cuz we're 'ard.
Dorchester Town: Dorkchester or The Maggots.
Dover Athletic: Dover; well they are just boring.
Forest Green Rovers: Forest Gump.
Hayes: 'Ayes or The Missioners.
Hednesford Town: The Pits(men) or Hednesfraud or the VATmen.
Hereford United: (The)Bulls******s.
Kettering Town: Kettrin'.
Kidderminster Harriers: Jellyroll Janice's Girls (JJG).
Kingstonian: K's.
Leigh RMI: [No ideas at all - help!]
Morecambe: Morescum or SMS (Sellafield Mutated Shrimps) .
Northwich Victoria: Vics.
Nuneaton Borough: Nuneaton.
Rushden and Diamonds: Ru$hden or Kick 'n' Ru$hden or The Annies or Little Orphan Annie or TBCINL (The Biggest Team In Non-League) [© Sky Sports] or TANLF (The Aristocrats of Non-League Football) [© Des Lynham].
Scarborough: Scabby / Scabbie.
Southport: Scouseport or (The) 'Port or The Sandgrinders.
Stevenage Borough: DCB (Dirty Cheating B*st*rds) or Cheatenage or Satanage or OGO (Obese Gut Overhang) [but less relevant since the departure of Fatboy Fat].
Surrey Teams: Surrey Slurry, which can be used interchangeably for any team from Four-wheel Drive Land.
Surrey's lowest placed side: WTIS (Worst Team In Slurry); another moveable feast.
Sutton United: Slutton or (The) U's.
Telford United: The *ucks.
Welling: GDWTW (Going Down With The Welling) which can be shortened to GDWs (Going Down Withs) or, when they lose in a cup, GOWTW (Going Out With The Welling) or The Wings because we rather like them really.
Weymouth: Why?mouth or Seaside Slime/Scum or (The) Terrables. If stuck with allocating any general abuse in a HHH review to a particular team just presume it refers to Why?mouth, and you'll be correct more often than not.
Woking: The Cards, which is what they call themselves; and that's good enough for us.
Yeovil Town: MGAW (Mighty Green And Whites), and we are!

The Grounds.

Aggborough: Haggborough home of The Girls.
Belle Vue: Hell View.
Broadfield Way: Broadmoor Way, home of Tufty the Squirrel.
Bucks Head: *uckhead.
Keys Park: Skis Parky. It's cold in them thar hills.
Nene Park: Need Park, because they've hardly got two pennies, the poor things.
Park View Road: PVR for the locals but we prefer TVR (Tart View Road), and if you know why...... shame on you. Also San Siro.
Rockingham Road: Rockinghorse Road.
Twerton Park: Twerpton (Park).
Wessex Stadium: (The) Wessucks.

Any resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidental.

BFG: Big Friendly Giant (some say other things!), a.k.a. Geoff Chapple.
Big Col : ex-manager of Yeovil now at Kingfield.
Billy "The Fish" Turkey: expensive keeper of dubious talent who at £130,000 could only be afforded by .........
EWBAMBNET: Ex-West Bromwich Albion Manager Brian "No Excuses" Talbot, a tactical genius.
The Borg: a man familiar with the dark arts of football management currently with The 'Sh*ts.
Fatboy Fat: large ex-DCB striker now with Don't Arse.
FCRM: Football Club Repair Man, manager at Huish Park.
Floorcloth: manager, for the second time, of A Certain Side In Hertfordshire.
Fu*c*er: an ex-manager of Southport.
The HobbitsHobbins: controllers of the destiny of GDWTW.
HHH: Huge Huish Hugh - who else?
Jellyroll Janice or The Danish Pastry: adopted Scouser and Jack remembered for his pace and driving skills.
JF or The Janitor: John Fry, Yeovil Town chairman.
Maxamillion: well known manufacturer of footwear.
Mole-hill: manager before manager before last of A Certain Side In Hertfordshire.
NTLUH: Not The Leeds United Huckerby...... in other words Scott.
Rookem Bymiles: boss near the Dogger Bank.
Mr Steve Chris Evans: manager of the Grims.
Victor Green: a wonderful man for whom no superlative is too ridiculous, forever associated in our minds with A Certain Hertfordshire Club.

Miscellaneous.

RANCID: Ru$hden Actually Need Cash Injected Desperately, a Ciderspace appeal to help a club in dire need. Give generously.
TWCBNCTWG: The West Country's Best Newspaper Called The Western Gazette. Speaks for itself.

HHH.

*Inclusion in this Guide in no way implies originality for any of the contents.